构筑健康婚姻~~《纽约时报》婚前15问

2 [) s8 ^9 W  `5 p$ n' S" S1. 我们要不要孩子？如果要，主要由谁来负责？

2. 我们的家庭赚钱能力及目标是什么？消费观及储蓄观会不会发生冲突？

3. 我们的家庭如何维持？由谁来掌握可能出现的风险?
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- F3 ]1 q/ x% T2 W! h4. 我们有没有详尽地交换过双方的疾病史？包括精神上的.
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* Z, w  H6 D! H& t+ C9 s6 V5 D5. 我们父母的态度有没有达到我们的预期？会不会给足够的祝福？

6. 我们有没有自然、坦诚地说出自己的性需求、性的偏好及恐惧？
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  L! ^$ N+ r5 ]7. 卧室能放电视机吗？

8. 我们真的能倾听对方诉说，并公平对待对方的想法和抱怨吗？
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' V7 N7 D2 C. g$ K- e. A9. 我们清晰地了解对方的精神需求及信仰吗？我们讨论过孩子将来的信仰问题吗？

10. 我们喜欢并尊重对方的朋友吗？

& \/ t% N% p- B, H( g7 ]8 x0 x" C, ~11. 我们能不能看重并尊敬对方的父母？我们有没考虑到父母可能会干涉我们的关系？

' g' D3 o2 h, V* |6 A$ e" @12. 我的家庭最让你心烦的事情是什么？
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; T% s3 q4 y, B- x5 i7 D13. 我们永远不会因为婚姻放弃的东西是什么？
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14. 如果我们中的一人需要离开其家族所在地陪同另一个人到外地工作，做得到吗？

$ d4 C2 r6 k% i  |15. 我们是不是充满信心面对任何挑战使婚姻一直往前走？
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原文：
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Relationship experts report that too many couples fail to ask each other
$ c' G9 C  E: C  X. H critical questions before marrying. Here are a few key ones that
" J% O* a+ ^( j/ Q: `1 T9 I$ H couples should consider asking:

1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?
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' v5 {+ A5 E# j& |/ A4 |& V, V 2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?
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3) Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?

* U) ?; D; x& J1 U/ W2 o 4) Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?

8 K2 ?1 H7 }6 k3 b2 {) Z 5) Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?
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6) Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences and fears?

7) Will there be a television in the bedroom?
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- q- t; o( p( D1 i 8) Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?

- c" V5 l) n! n7 |" Y& y# O 9) Have we reached a clear understanding of each other’s spiritual beliefs and needs, and have we discussed when and how our children will be exposed to religious/moral education?
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10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?

11) Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?
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12) What does my family do that annoys you?

13) Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?
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14) If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?
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15) Does each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges


1 X* I0 D( `& S' u+ [简单说就是建立沟通和尊重的基础，是不是？


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