构筑健康婚姻~~《纽约时报》婚前15问

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1. 我们要不要孩子？如果要，主要由谁来负责？

2. 我们的家庭赚钱能力及目标是什么？消费观及储蓄观会不会发生冲突？

3. 我们的家庭如何维持？由谁来掌握可能出现的风险?
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' U; @- Y7 X+ B1 @) r; G& X4. 我们有没有详尽地交换过双方的疾病史？包括精神上的.
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' d. [% B9 r& H5. 我们父母的态度有没有达到我们的预期？会不会给足够的祝福？

+ x' m: a2 T0 V7 c; H- a/ \6. 我们有没有自然、坦诚地说出自己的性需求、性的偏好及恐惧？

6 I* Y. y. i8 `% B1 Y0 X7. 卧室能放电视机吗？

6 u. y- a0 F' r8. 我们真的能倾听对方诉说，并公平对待对方的想法和抱怨吗？
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9. 我们清晰地了解对方的精神需求及信仰吗？我们讨论过孩子将来的信仰问题吗？
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10. 我们喜欢并尊重对方的朋友吗？

+ R0 O% z2 W1 o* s, Y% J/ Y11. 我们能不能看重并尊敬对方的父母？我们有没考虑到父母可能会干涉我们的关系？
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7 k5 n+ X9 h, ~  }7 d* n12. 我的家庭最让你心烦的事情是什么？

13. 我们永远不会因为婚姻放弃的东西是什么？

2 H& Z0 r( ?& j2 i" n14. 如果我们中的一人需要离开其家族所在地陪同另一个人到外地工作，做得到吗？

15. 我们是不是充满信心面对任何挑战使婚姻一直往前走？


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, X( a% |) w  _" C原文：
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  g* Z. a$ H7 e( `  I, nRelationship experts report that too many couples fail to ask each other
9 x5 o& {# o4 J% q3 `, W) R0 |6 k& v1 L critical questions before marrying. Here are a few key ones that
couples should consider asking:
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! H' g. @0 ~; k/ Q# I$ W. { 1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?

2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?
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3) Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?

" R& H& ?4 |. F6 M 4) Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?
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5) Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?
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1 ]% [. L  T) P% Y' U 6) Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences and fears?
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5 A) h& B% O6 d. q) ]' |2 b: f4 t: h 7) Will there be a television in the bedroom?

: X5 H; B" m3 I8 Z! p+ U6 y 8) Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?

2 h/ o0 k" X$ P4 J2 C7 t( k 9) Have we reached a clear understanding of each other’s spiritual beliefs and needs, and have we discussed when and how our children will be exposed to religious/moral education?
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10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?

11) Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?
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. S) q  Z! B5 V8 N7 t 12) What does my family do that annoys you?

13) Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?
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, _& m3 {) s0 l$ r; V0 E 14) If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?
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15) Does each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges


3 z* y! Q0 Z, T% J6 v简单说就是建立沟通和尊重的基础，是不是？
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